Sacrilegious Muffcakes

Last night I agonized over what goodie I would bring down to Miami tomorrow, to see my aunts, uncles and various cousins. #firstworldproblems. Can you hashtag in a blog? Anyway, my first thought was to make palmiers because I remember back in the days of New York when I was all…French…ish, making them for Tia Yoyi, and them being her favorites. Then I saw what time of day it was and analyzed my energy level. Nope. Not today.

Brownies were a must for the cousins, because they saw the Baked brownie post and let me know exactly how they felt on my Facebook wall. Then I looked at my pantry. And at the time of day. And analyzed my energy level.


Then I thought cookies! But I didn’t want to have to shape or drop dozens of sticky, gooey balls of dough, and then have to fit them into several Christmas cookie tins. Tactful, that. Plus, I figured 2 dozen cookies per aunt and two cousins was a bit much. Then, it hit me.

I looked at the muffin tin I’d gotten out for the brownies (brownies made in muffin liners are easier to transport. And they’re cute). I hit the preheat on the oven and dove for the cookie sheet drawer. Like a boss. Retrieving the mini muffin tins, I grabbed the left over mini liners from Christmas (they’re white, and thus no one would ever know) and prepped the tins. I didn’t know what I was going to fill them with, but by God, I knew it was going to be shaped like a tiny muffin.

I looked guiltily at the unsweetened chocolate that was sitting out in forlorn abandonment, its dreams to be used in Baked brownies having been systematically crushed. Chocolate mini muffins. Done. I Googled my choice and picked the most tantalizing-looking specimen. Which ended up being another Martha Stewart recipe. Fml. Oh well, I’m going to hell regardless of whether I support a Spawn of Satan. Stewart’s one-bowl chocolate cake it was. Of course, it was awesome. Especially because I only dirtied one bowl, and the cake turned out chocolatey and moist. And, surprisingly had only a tablespoon and a half of oil. Win.

Now, for the aunt. I thought of something delicate and…aunt-y. Tea cakes! With yogurt! Because our refrigerator was filled with two things at the moment: Activia blueberry yogurt and left-over Chinese food. Mmmm. General Tso. I found this recipe, tweaked it and halved it. Did I mention I had no baking powder? I had no baking powder. So I used only baking soda. Why the original recipe thought it necessary to use both baking powder and soda, and yogurt is beyond me. I feel it’s akin to using scented deodorant and perfume, or two condoms. Better safe than sorry, I guess.

Well, my tweaks worked better than I expected. Granted, I didn’t expect a whole lot, but better to aim low and shoot high than the other way around…unless the target is low. I never understood that analogy.

But here are some awesome muffcakes! Too delicate to be muffins, not bad enough for you to be cupcakes. They are “frosted” accordingly.

Martha’s One-Bowl Chocolate Cake

6 tablespoons Cocoa powder

3/4 cup Flour

3/4 cup Sugar

1 teaspoon Baking soda*

1/4 teaspoon Salt*

1 Egg

6 tablespoons warm Water

6 tablespoons Buttermilk

2 tablespoons Oil*

1/2 teaspoon Vanilla

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees, and line a mini muffin tin with awesome tiny liners. You’ll have a little left-over batter, so you can line more adorable tiny muffin tins, or make an adorable tiny loaf, like I did.

2. Combine and whisk together all of the dry ingredients

3. Whisk the egg in a separate bowl (LIES!! See?! Demon-spawn! This isn’t a “one-bowl recipe”!) until no white globules remain

4. Add all of the wet to the dry and stir just to combine.

5. Distribute in your prepared tiny muffin tins and bake for about 10 minutes, or until springy.

*The original recipe calls for (in the whole recipe) 1 1/2 teaspoons of baking soda and 3/4 teaspoons of baking powder

**Original recipe calls only for 3 tablespoons of oil, so it would be 1 1/2 tablespoons when halved. I didn’t care enough to divide a tablespoon.

Kaluha Glaze

1/2 cup Powdered sugar

1-2 tablespoons of Kaluha

1. Whisk together adding Kaluha as needed to make the consistency of cinnamon bun glaze….mmmm. Cinnamon buns.


Blueberry Yogurt Tea Cakes

3/4 cup Flour

1/2 teaspoon Baking soda

1/4 teaspoon Salt

1/2 cup (4-oz. container of yogurt flavor of choice. I used blueberry)

1/2 cup Sugar

1 Egg

1/4 cup Olive oil (whatever grade you like. I used extra virgin, because I’m a rebel.)

1/2 teaspoon extract of choice (I used orange)

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and prepare a mini muffin tin with mini muffin liners (Man, it’s fun to say “mini muffin”)

2. Combine dry ingredients and whisk to incorporate

3. In a separate bowl, whisk together the egg, yogurt, extract and oil.

4. Add wet to dry and fold to incorporate.

5. distribute amongst the batter homes and bake for about 10 minutes, or until springy. Again, you’ll have enough left over batter to make a tiny loaf, or maybe 6-8 more mini muffins. You can also through it in a mug, microwave for 1 minute or two, and have yourself a mugcake.

Grand Marnier Glaze

1/2 cup Powdered Sugar

1-2 tablespoons Grand Marnier, or other orange-flavored liquor.

1. Add enough liquor to make the glaze a dippable consistency. Like cinnamon bun glaze…mmmm. Cinnamon buns.


3 thoughts on “Sacrilegious Muffcakes

  1. Remember the days when a hashtag was called a pound sign?
    Also, now that you’ve admitted that the muffin-liners were from Xmas, we ALL know and can therefore hold it against you.

    These look divine.

    Also, while reading this entry, I was reminded that maybe you haven’t heard of Drunk Kitchen on youtube before, and if not, that needs to be rectified immediately. Please proceed to check it out. I recommend starting with the taco episode, or the pizza episode.

  2. Love your sense of humor, love your ADD and love your sarcasm. I agree about Martha Stewart, disagree with you going to hell but ya know…..mostly because I’m going to be pissed if in heaven I can’t still steal your recipes. Got anymore whiskey recipes? Most people think I won’t be able to still have that in heaven so I’m thinking that just means I should find more opportunities to get enjoy it now.

    • Word. I don’t at the moment, but because you asked, I will. I love the stuff, and always take requests, advice, suggestions, etc. Unless it’s stupid and irrelevant. Even then. I like doing stupid and irrelevant things. But that doesn’t pertain to whiskey because whiskey is always relevant. Thanks for the comment!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s