I don’t think I’ve yet been hit with the enormity of yesterday’s events. I think my brain might be subconsciously damming a flood whose scale surpasses that which would be were Niagra Falls to suddenly be teleported to the Galapagos Islands while it was simultaneously being hit by a tidal wave caused by a 9.8 100 miles offshore.
Yesterday, I realized that my cornbread recipe from culinary school was missing.
The recipe that procured the most tender, corny, succulent, honey-butter-maple-syrup-drenched goodness this world and time has ever had the privilege of experiencing.
I switched to emergency mode:
- Don’t panic
- Think where was the last time you saw it
- Don’t panic
- Ask if anyone has seen it
- DON’T PANIC
- Email any contacts from culinary school to possibly re-obtain missing recipe
- DON’T PANIC
Unfortunately, it wasn’t anywhere in the entire house (or the neighbor’s for that matter…); no one was home to ask; and no one responded to my emails within the 20 minutes it took me to do the first two.
The first place I go when I’m looking for a particular recipe is Google images. I remember dishes by the way they taste, smell and look…and since we haven’t yet figured out how to make computers mimic those sensory experiences (Seriously, science guys. Get on it.) , I search via visual appearance. And what I remember from school, was that the bread was tender and light—but not light enough to be a cake, and not dense enough to be corn bread. Once I found my visual match, I looked at the recipe. I did remember that the school’s recipe had both oil and butter. Check. I also remembered there was a bit-o-honey. Check. And milk. Check. So far so good; and after checking 10 other leads, I settled on the recipe below.
It was good. I mean good. Of course…it wasn’t GOOD like only the school’s recipe could be, but it would suffice for its purpose. And that purpose was as a birthday gift. Unfortunately, it was a gift to my brother-in-law, who had fallen in love with the school’s corn bread the first day I brought it home from class. Fortunately, when I presented it to him that first time, I’m pretty sure his jaw unhinged as he shoved the entire loaf in his mouth, so I’m not sure he was able to appreciate the intricacies of the balance of flavors and textures.
Plus, when I presented the new recipe and asked if it passed muster, all he could manage over chipmunk cheeks full of cornbread was “Mmmfpt hrlmft mm bamhmm.”
Despite apparent success, the hunt continues. It’s the only thing keeping me going in this now-meaningless abyss of existence.
½ cup Cornmeal
¾ cup Cake flour
¾ cup Bread flour
*note: You could also just use 1 ½ cups all purpose…but where’s the fun in that?*
2/3 cup Sugar
1 tablespoon Baking powder
½ teaspoon Salt
1/3 cup Oil
3 tablespoons Butter, melted
1-2 tablespoons Honey
2 Eggs, beaten
1 ¼ cups Milk (I used whole)
- Preheat oven to 350º
- Spray a 9×5 loaf pan with non-stick spray
- In one large bowl, combine flours, meal, powder, salt and sugar
- In a Pyrex® (I really just wanted a chance to use the ®), or a microwaveable bowl, combine butter and honey and nuke til melted.
- Allow honey butter to run down your chin as you poor it all in your mouth cool slightly before adding oil
- Make a well in the center of dry ingredients and add milk and eggs
- Stir until nearly combined (still lumpy) then add butter and stir until smooth
- Bake 35-40 minutes (until it passes the toothpick test.